Dear Black Son,

25 Nov


Dear Black Son,

You are too young to know about what’s happening in the world around you, but on August 9, 2014 in Ferguson, Missouri, an 18 year old black male was fatally shot by Darren Wilson, a white police officer.  This shooting resulted in people protesting, a community upset, and a world with questions. Last night, Officer Wilson was not indicted for shooting Brown, and it left our nation in an uproar.

After the decision was made,several thoughts and emotions ran through my mind. How can this officer not be charged with anything? How is it, that I log into social media, and people are tearing Brown apart for actions that aren’t admirable, and hailing Wilson as some type of hero?  What kind of world do we live in that people constantly get away with the murdering of young black boys? Do Black Lives even Matter?

Then I remembered.

We live in a world where Stand Your Ground works for certain people, yet a mother could lose her child when he is fatally shot for wearing a hoodie walking in his father’s neighborhood.

A world, where a Black man can get 35 years for killing a police dog, but be shot 6 times with no weapon and left in the streets.

As your mother, this scares me. How, can I raise you in a world that is already set up to be against you? All I can do is :

Teach you right from wrong, encourage you to make the best decisions, but remember, there are always circumstances for our actions.

Surround yourself with positive people and spread positivity.

9 times out of 10 this will work, and at times it may just be a bit more difficult for you. Also,
Try your best NOT to be in the wrong place at the wrong time (even though at times this doesn’t even make a difference)

Regardless of race, sexual preference, or circumstance.

At the end of the day, this is always where I start. I ask God to cover you, protect you, and keep you, in a world full of so much evil and hate.

Accept the fact, that no matter how brilliant, beautiful, and bright you are my child, some people will only look at you for the color of your skin. They won’t get to know your personality, they won’t get to see how wonderful you are, they will look at you and see a young black male, The most frightening thing for me to accept, but it is a reality, which is why I pray.

My heart goes out to the family of Mike Brown, not only because of their loss, but the simple fact, that they did not get the justice they were seeking for their son. Also, that their child is being exploited and he’s not here to defend himself.

It’s time that we wake up America, and realize what is going on. I hear so many people talk about how , black people always bring up the race card, but this is our life. This is what we live. It’s not that we ASK to be the victim of racism, we are! I’m a firm believer in LOVING EVERYONE, and UNITY, but it’s hard when we live in a world so black and white.

To my white friends that don’t understand, WAKE UP! This isn’t just an AFRICAN AMERICAN PROBLEM, it’s a NATION’S Problem! ALL LIVES ARE IMPORTANT! ALL LIVES MATTER! Not just the lives of those who live with a clean slate of never doing wrong! It’s going to take ALL OF US working together to make a difference. No ONE group can do it alone.


To my black son. I love you. You are my heart. You are my life.  YOU MATTER. Your LIFE MATTERS. And don’t ever let anyone tell you any different.

Until Next Time, MrsSPJ

Black Man in America Laurie Cooper

    Black Man in America
           Laurie Cooper

The Roof is On Fire!

23 Oct

The past few days have been hectic at my job because we are finally getting some work done on this old house we call our office.
Today, I looked up to see the beautiful roof the men worked so hard on. It’s beautiful. A pretty light gray color, and it lays so perfectly.
Then I looked at our old building. Our office building is pretty tattered, and we could use a new building altogether. It was then,
God spoke to me. He said, “You can’t put a new roof on an old building“.

It was such a profound message, I had to stop and appreciate it!

It reminded me of all the passages in the Bible that talk about the importance of a Strong foundation.
I  also reminded me  of Matthew 9:16, “No one sews a patch of unshrunk cloth on an old garment,
for the patch will pull away from the garment, making the tear worse”.

It was such a special message, I went and shared it with a co worker. She reminded me that sometimes, you have to get your roof fixed. My belief, is that by starting over, building a new, SOLID ROCK foundation, it will make us new all over! I believe that is what God wants for us. He wants to make us new, rebuild our foundation, and change us all over. God can fix ANYTHING! He can restore us, renew us, and ultimately set our roof on FIRE! God loves us, and he wants so much for us!

Let us pray that God will fix us from the inside out! That he can strengthen our hearts, our foundation, our lives and make us new! Afterall, if anyone can, he can!

Until Next Time, Much Love, mrsspj
P.S.- This post will be featured on Sprinkle Of Jesus soon!

What’s Up with this Mommy?

13 Oct

Hey Friends!

I know.. I know.. It’s been too long… But you know how that is, Life happens, things get busy, and before you know it, it’s been a whole MONTH since you’ve posted! (Don’t kill me) However, God is good as always, and this MrsSpj along with my family, have been SUPER Busy!

NEW BLOGGER- Sprinkle of Jesus
I’m now a guest blogger on Sprinkle of Jesus! I love everything that Dana Chanel stands for and her movement of bringing young people to Christ so I’m more than honored to be a guest blogger on her site. It’s a very moving and fullfilling site, You can follow her on Instagram at DanaChanel . See below why I’m such a huge fan:

Christian has been repping some amazing brands! I try to show the world that styling a little boy can be fun! Christian currently represents Two Little Kings  and Rad Republic Threads! They both offer some amazing items for little boys! Check out Christian Rocking these brands:























TOUGH HUBBER/I mean Mudder-
The husband completed his first ever Tough Mudder! He was so excited and pumped up from doing it! Let me tell you now, this is something you don’t EVER have to worry about me doing, but I’m so proud of him and he has already started training and planning to do one again! If you think you are up to it, go ahead! But let me show you what  you are getting yourself into:

After the "Shock"

After the “Shock”

All in all, trying to balance the mom,wife,work, life mode can be tough at times! I keep saying I’m going to do better, and although I try, I sometimes just have to take a break. I love keeping in touch with you all, and sharing my world with you though!!! Don’t fret, I’m coming back!

P.S.- Did I tell you I cut one side of my hair super short? It’s really cute, but I’m not sure it’s me. However, I did what I had to, so this hair could grow!  Team Healthy Hair!



Until Next Time, Much Love,




Having a W.O.W. Moment

3 Sep


I’m having a wow moment for this weight on Wednesday post.
It’s Wednesday so having an accountability factor includes posting on Wed.
I know, I’ve been slack at times. Between being a Mom, Wife, and full time coordinator for a non profit,
I get swamped, but I keep telling myself, that is no reason not to post (I have to convince myself) .

This morning, I decided I was going to get on the scale to see where I was.
When I stepped on the scale, I was taken back!
I think I gulped really hard, blinked my eyes a few times, and looked again.

“This can’t be right!” , I thought.
How have I managed to pick up pounds again?

I got back on the scale (like it was going to say something different),
and this time it was even more than the first time!
(I think I weighed myself 4 times this morning)

I’m not going to lie. I was disappointed in myself because I work so hard.

However, instead of sulking, I decided to look over my plan, and figure out what I was doing wrong.

A few things I found:

I’m not eating enough at breakfast.
Not eating enough leads me to sometimes overeating at lunch.
I sometimes eat too late.
I sometimes skip meals without even realizing it.

All these issues lead me to sabotaging my own success.

So it’s time to do something new.
I’m doing better with the snack thing, although there is still always a way to improve.

I’m so serious about this weight loss, and I want to see myself change.
I’ve gotten stronger, but it’s time to make the scale move more!

Stay motivated folks! It’s hard, but we can do it!!!

My Mommy (I mean Newborn) Must Haves (or favorites)

11 Aug

Hello Friends!

Because I didn’t update much while I was pregnant, I always like to use Mondays to reflect on Motherhood, and maybe even reflect back! This Monday, I wanted to share with you my Mommy must haves when Christian was a baby!!


The most incredible little things these were! I remember after Christian was born, he was super fussy one night. I didn’t know what tll the fuss was, and did everything in my power to comfort him. One nurse came in, asked if we needed anything, and we let her know our son was a little bit fussier than normal. She told us, “you swaddled him all wrong!” I watched as she picked my little 9 pounder up, and swaddled him perfectly. It was as if the gates of heaven opened, and he went peacefully to sleep. For 3 months straight, swaddlers did the trick!We really liked Halo’s sleepsacks and Summer Infant the best!


Call me paranoid, but this little device put me at east like you would NEVER believe. I was on the fence when it came to baby monitorsbut knew that I wanted one. We had friends who had lost their babies to SIDS, and had read various stories (the internet is horrible for those reasons alone), and it just made me nervous. I had heard about the SNUZA and was convinced it was the one I had to have. We loved it because it was mobile, comfortable for baby, and more than anything, RELIABLE. I remember the first night I woke up from its alarm. It scared me at first, because Christian was so still and til this day we don’t know what that brief moment was caused by or about, but SNUZA brought me so much relief. The little device clips to the child’s diaper and detects their breathing. If they aren’t breathing properly, it buzzes to alert them, and then an alarm will sound to alert you. One of my ALL TIME FAVORITE things in the world. There were a few false alarms when Christian became very active, but I appreciated it, because it let me know the product WORKED. DEFINITE must have for me.


Brilliant little seahorse! This was one of Christian’s first and FAVORITE toy of all. When Christian was a newborn we would push the Seahorse’s little stomach so that it would glow and play soft music for our baby boy. He loved it! His eyes would fixate on the little glowing stomach and he lullabies would sooth him to sleep. After 5 minutes, the little seahorse would turn off, and baby boy would be sleep. In the beginning he didn’t grasp it as much, but a time came when he was old enough he would push the little seahorse’s stomach and lay down. We have purchased other items with the same idea in mind, yet Christian always reverted back to this one. It even was packed to go on a trip with us just to keep little man happy.


I’m convinced that when you have a newborn this is the ONLY (well maybe not), but BEST way to go! Some people think why should I buy this car seat that I can only use until the baby is 20+ pounds when convertible car seats go way beyond that. HERE’S WHY: When you are out and about with baby, and you need to go in the store, out walking, etc. you will appreciate having that car seat that can go in a buggy at the grocery store, on that stroller when you are out walking, and being able to sit it down softly when you come in the house and find you have to use the bathroom badly! We had the B-Safe by Britax, and my husband and I hated almost regretted having to switch our child out to a bigger car seat!! The B safe car seat with the B- Agile was the best Travel System for us! I still use the stroller today!


The best of the best HANDS DOWN! I remember seeing my friend Jen put her baby in what to me originally seemed like some type of contraption.
I didn’t see what all the hype was about when It came to Ergobaby until I tried on several carriers. Ergobaby not only has baby’s comfort in mind but momma’s comfort as well! It felt good on my back (I had several back problems and pain after having Christian) and Christian was so snuggly in it. I used the carrier to travel, clean, and to support baby while I was out and about. If you want a good reliable carrier, pay the price and get an Ergobaby! It’s worth it!  I knew I wasn’t going to be one of those moms who had her baby wrapped up to her. The thought of wearing my baby with a wrap terrified me! Ergobaby was perfect and super easy to use!


Can we say lifesaver? After having a c section the healing process can take some time. Our pak and play was a lifesaver. My husband could move it around where it needed to be, and I could get to baby very easily. Christian loved his pak and play so much, he would fall asleep in it without a problem! I recommend pak and plays to keep baby active yet safe when they are still small.

This pillow was used for so many different things from breastfeeding to having the baby lay comfortable, etc.,I could go on and on! There is a reason this pillow is a top baby purchase until this day! It just works! We had two or three different covers that we would swap out!


Can we talk about how wonderful they are? My son was a very gassy baby and uncomfortable so many times, but these gas drops gave him sooO much relief. I read about them and had heard other mommies talking about them, but I wasn’t sure if it was the right thing for my son. Gas drops immediately calmed my son and he would sleep so peacefully. (WHERE HAVE THOSE DAYS GONE?) We loved the Little Tummys brand from Walgreens.


It deserves it’s own listing because to me when gas drops wouldn’t work, Gripe water did. Gripe Water to me was like gingerale for babies. Gripe Water would get rid of my son’s hiccups and if he was gassy it also worked for that as well. I found sometimes Gripe water worked and other times Gas Drops did. He also loved the taste of it!


It became my son’s favorite thing even more the older he got. It’s the best of both worlds: A Pacifier and Stuffed Animal. I loved it, because I could give it to my son at night in his pak and play and not worry about the cord getting wrapped around his neck or causing him discomfort. He became so fond of the wubbanub (we called it Clifford!) With it’s size, it wouldn’t get lost, Christian was easily able to hold it in his hands, and he loved it! He was heartbroken when we decided not to give him a pacifier anymore! We didn’t want a toddler walking around with a Binky!

So those are 10 of my favorite items Christian used as a newborn!! If I had to do it all over again (and who knows I just may one day), I would have at least these 10 items on hand! What are some of your favorite baby items?

Until Next Time, Much Love,

Mrs. SPJ

Birthday Fun with my Mom

8 Aug

Today, I want to wish my mom a very happy birthday!

1459228_923770290510_2001953168_nSometimes, being away from Family is hard. I miss North Carolina more than you’ll ever know!!

So Mom, let’s just pretend for a minute that I’m there.

Let’s start the day off with mani and pedis at Tony’s little Nail shop (Nail World) down the street. (We love them and have been going to them for years)

Let’s then go eat lunch at Krazy’s. I’m thinking a house salad with Italian dressing, oh and let’s ask the waitress for the ranch as well.(They taste so great together)

Let’s stop in Roses. We hardly ever buy anything there, but always seem to look anywho.

Let’s do a little shopping in the mall. Maybe J.C. Penny’s will have some great sale we can take advantage of!

Let’s kill some time hitting up some stores all around town.

It’s dinner time. I’m thinking Olive Garden. It’s one of your favorites (Kind of one of mine too since that’s where Jermaine asked me to be his wife)

Let’s finish the night with Misto Shakes from Rita’s. Gotta love that good ol Rita.

Now we are back at the house, I’m up for a scary movie, are you?

If I were in North Carolina, I believe our day would go very much like this. Don’t you think?

Well let’s just imagine the day is just like that. You can do so much with an active imagination.

Love you Mom. Miss U.

Happy Birthday,

Until Next Time, Mrs. SPJ :)










Expect More

5 Aug

Hello Friends!

I have to tell you about a very interesting conversation I had recently.

A lovely young lady asked me what it was like being young and married. I politely explained to her that it has its ups and downs like most things in life, but it’s what you make it.She proceeded to tell me that SEVERAL people had advised her to get even closer to her man, she should move in with him, and even, well, let me put it in her words,”test drive the car before you buy it”.I assured her while her friends may have had her best interest at heart, I could not recommend the same.

Let me take you down a stroll on memory lane.

I remember in 2008 when I truly knew that J was the one for me.
He was everything I never wanted but all that I needed wrapped up into one amazing man.

US in 2006

In my opinion, we fell for each other early on even though we were both hesitant. It was in 2009 when he proposed (such a cute story Ill have to tell you about later)
Anyhow, I was encouraged by my peers to move in with him as well when we became serious.

“What if it doesn’t work out?”, some said.

“You don’t even know what it’s like really being with him yet”, others chimed in since we had been doing this long distance thing forever.

My future hubby to be even mentioned it a few times, and the thought of it all was driving me insane.

“They are right”, I thought.

I even started thinking he may change his mind about marrying me since we did do this long distance thing forever.
After pondering it over and over again and praying about it, I just couldn’t do it.

It went against everything I believed in and the thought of me moving there before we were married, well it made me sick , even gave me headaches.

I broke the news to my “now” husband. He hesitantly was like, “well, ok”.

Now here we are, after 4 years of dating long distance, and almost 4 years of marriage, with the cutest lil man ever.

Some people are probably thinking okay Mrs.SPJ, what’s your point?

My point is, I stood by what I believed in and more than anything, I feel like my expectations, led me to more.

Just as the young woman I was having the conversation with.

I told her, to follow her heart.

In my mind, you don’t need to test drive a “man” or move in with him to see if it will work.
You put your faith in God that he will make a way and that in itself will make it work.

When you expect more, you get more.

I truly believe that is with anything.

Someone once asked me, what if my he (my husband) would have said, well then I can’t do this relationship? My response?

Well then I wouldn’t have been the one for him.

I believe God has someone for each and everyone of us, and that they should love us and accept us for who we are. They should celebrate our differences, and though we may not agree on everything, respect us. We shouldn’t have to change the beliefs that are deeply rooted in us to appease a relationship. I think that’s what is wrong with so many relationships today. We twist, turn, and change so much to accommodate others, but do we do the same for ourselves?

It’s time to expect more, and get the same in return.

Until Next Time, Much Love, Mrs. SPJ :)


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